95: the trouble with blogs

January 20, 2010

The trouble with a blog is it’s out there for all to see while events are still playing out.

Say so-and-so  is behaving like a so-and-so, say, just hypothetically, obsessed with their tiny pixel, blissfully unaware of the extra work they’re creating for those who labour night and day to manifest the big picture, for love and little or no pay…

You can’t just call them a so-and-so. Because they might read it and remove their precious little pixel which would create even more work to hold it all together, make it happen, get this show on the road.

Am I being too oblique? Like I said, the trouble with blogs.

No – for now, nothing will make me divulge what exactly what was the so-and-sowing presently at issue, was it a big thing or merely (nearly) the last straw?

Yes, for now, we’ve got alter-ego John Crow under heavy manners, if not heavy sedation. This is John Constable – writer, producer >>(but this time NOT playing the part of John Crow the sha-manic prophet of The Goose – at least not in the production in Southwark Cathedral, in which the CHARACTER John Crow will be played by an ACTOR.  (Well, he did warn you, he’s tricky!) >> << For more on John Crow, see:


>> LIVE UPDATE: Katie says: one day someone’ll find this blog and say: wow! this was 100 days of JC’s life intact.
I say: They may argue about how intact it was, even when it was being written.<<

And give thanks, I say: may these 100 days be a kind of training for fearlessness and firmness, steadfastness in the face of so-and-soing in all its dehumanising guises, may this make me strong and fearless and ready to take on injustice and ignorance and the rest! Blimey, did I say that? Yes, and mean it.

Partner and Girl-Friday-beyond-call-of-duty Katie had to talk me back twice today from resigning as default producer. Director Sarah did the same over lunch (on her, at Jerwood Space cafe) – and gave me 20 minutes listening therapy while I moaned about my 11 hour unpaid producer’s workdays, before we got down to the talking about the play, the production itself, the creative stuff, the reason for doing it.

Or, at least, the method in the madness.

After that I went to visit Ion Will, in Intensive Care at St Thomas’ hospital. He’d had a major operation only 2 nights before but was returning to his ebullient self – though he seemed changed by his brush with mortality. He had his own morphine pump and was eager to share with me his visionary journey in the underworld and how he rejected his own death.

Some say Mr I.W. is the Mother-of-all-So-and-Sos. I say: No man can judge another’s soul. Sitting with Ion, mostly just listening to his near-death insights and pleased to see his spirits revive as he spoke – then all the so-and-soing of the day all slipped away from me, and it brought me back in touch with what is real – which is the struggle to transform ourselves here, in these bodies.

Ion said: You should go now. You’ve got more important things to do.
I said: No. This is the important thing. Yes, now I must go and do some less important things.

The theme of The Southwark Mysteries:
the triumph of Love over Fear.

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